well... i may have said this before on this tribe, but if you end up at the hospital for whatever reason... try to relax and be open. bring your birth plan. tell the staff what you want. ask for nurse backwoods. but be open because if you are scared and on the defense, there's a chance that your stress hormones will go through the roof and your labor will stall out. i have seen it so many times and it breaks my heart. fear of all sorts can slow labor down like any mammal looking for a safe place to birth.

interviewing nurses really isn't an option...plus, if you are in active labor, as you know, you are probably not going to be in a state of mind to interview anyone. you should wait until the last minute to go to the hospital. if you have someone who knows how to check a cervix, stay at home while you labor, that is the best. don't come to the hospital until you are very close. it's hard when you are having your first, but you can find someone truly wise and knowledgeable who can help you labor at home.

different hospitals have different levels of openness to people who are "going natural" or who aren't into the medical model so much; some very open, some not so much. like anything in life, if you push against something you'll meet even more resistance. it's can be a tai chi dance to birth at the hospital. empower yourself with knowledge. find out what the standard protocols are and if there are ways to work around them. most labor and delivery nurses are very cool people. they come from all walks of life and have different beliefs about labor and birth, both most of us are all there for the same reason. we love birth. we love women, babies, families, and the sanctity of birth and we believe women should have want they want in their births. but, at the hospital and at home, not everyone always get what they want. sometimes the epidural doesn't work and a woman has to have natural childbirth and sometimes you might need pitocin. i feel so odd sometimes piping up on this tribe because i work in a hospital, but i really want to support homebirth minded people when they end up in the hospital and i wish it wasn't so hard for them. we are dealing with hospitals and there is the simple reality of a certain amount of acceptance that you need to have in order to have a positive experience in any situation. i hate to see someone with a rigid birth plan who won't step into acceptance until they end up in the operating room and sometimes rigidity can take you straight to the OR.

at the same time, you shouldn't have your wishes chucked out the window. it is very reasonable to ask: please don't ask me to rate my pain, please don't give me an iv unless i really need one, please don't offer me drugs, please let me labor in the bathtub, please do interrmittent fetal monitoring, please let me try breast stilmulation instead of pitocin first, please don't take my blood pressure every 30 minutes, please let me push spontaneously, please put the baby on my belly and don't take her from me for the first hour, please don't break my bag, please massage me, please support me with loving words, please tell me i am progressing, please encourage me, please treat me like you would treat your best friend.

i feel like i am opening myself up to criticism here, but this is my two cents.